{"id":140,"date":"2015-06-17T23:08:24","date_gmt":"2015-06-18T04:08:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/?p=140"},"modified":"2025-02-14T21:59:02","modified_gmt":"2025-02-15T03:59:02","slug":"brief-moments","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/?p=140","title":{"rendered":"Brief moments"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I’m having a moment of calm and clarity tonight, and I wanted to share it. Unlike what one of my friends\u00a0seems to have believed of my previous behavior (and admired<\/em>\u00a0me for it), it’s not<\/em>\u00a0that I don’t care<\/em>\u00a0what others think about me. Far from it, actually. I think that some of the thoughts I’ve shared have made it pretty clear that I actually care a lot<\/em>\u00a0what people\u00a0think about me. Times like right now, though, make it clearer to me that I’m simply very<\/em>\u00a0careful about\u00a0who I allow close<\/em> to me. With one very<\/em>\u00a0notable exception, my judgment on such matters is usually quite<\/em> good. \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

I’ve written about this before. I pointed to the “standard wisdom” that says that, ideally, people should look only<\/em> inward for feelings of self-worth. As a matter of fact, I’d wager that’s probably the opinion of that other<\/em> friend I mentioned near the beginning of the last paragraph. Especially<\/em> for someone like me, though, there’s just something very lonely<\/em> about that thought. I think it’s more (for me<\/em>, anyway) about knowing with confidence<\/em> what one’s own strengths are and using that knowledge to “filter” input from other people. It’s not a total<\/em> filter. That’s important<\/em>, because goodness knows I’m far<\/em> from perfect, so I still have to pay attention to negative feelings from other people, especially<\/em> those that I have learned to deeply trust.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s one of the reasons the last few years have been (and current time continues to be) so tough<\/em> on me. I believe that I’m going to make it through all this, and I truly believe that I’m going to make it with fewer<\/em> changes\/adjustments than people seem to believe. I also<\/em> truly believe that this “new person” concept that seems to be so popular<\/em> to use with TBI sufferers\u2026 I won’t say it’s completely<\/em> not applicable to me, but I will<\/em> say that it’s not the right way for me<\/em> to approach things. My pre-wreck life was much<\/em> too good for me simply to throw away any attempt of trying to get back to it. Finally, I have a faith<\/em> that I’m capable of getting back to at least something close<\/em>. People can call it “spiritual” if they want to. This faith hasn’t come along with any<\/em> of the signs that spiritual people who have experienced these kinds of things often point to. My agnostic nature won’t allow me to completely deny<\/em> the involvement of some supernatural being, but I also<\/em> haven’t experienced anything<\/em> that points to my progress being due to anything other than <\/em>the help of other people, plain determination (both mine and others’), and time<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I think that something many people were looking for was for my feelings to become so strong<\/em> that I “couldn’t control” them. That entire concept<\/em> of emotions being so strong<\/em> that I can’t control them is something that has literally never happened to me<\/em>. That’s not because of anyone else. I also<\/em> believe, however, that it’s not a matter of me “holding back”. I think I simply fundamentally believe<\/em> that nothing<\/em> is beyond eventual<\/em> explanation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m having a moment of calm and clarity tonight, and I wanted to share it. Unlike what one of my friends\u00a0seems to have believed of my previous behavior (and admired\u00a0me for it), it’s not\u00a0that I don’t care\u00a0what others think about me. Far from it, actually. I think that some of the thoughts I’ve shared have […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[10,9,8,12],"class_list":["post-140","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-non-belief","tag-deep-thoughts","tag-depression","tag-recovery"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=140"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":528,"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/140\/revisions\/528"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=140"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=140"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oddlysincere.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=140"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}